Friday, August 29, 2003

We close at one. It is now pass that. Could you please molest this young man somewhere else?


Thursday, August 28, 2003

Always remember that love is like a dream of flying, one that always ends with your soul shattered on the rocks.

Always remember the look in people's eyes when they realize who you are. Cherish that look. It means you're safe.

Always make sure your knives are sharp...unless you're feeling particularly mean. Then use a spoon.

When torturing someone for information, always make sure that your boots have sturdy, non-slip soles. If you think walking on blood is slippery, try innards.

Never show anyone the stuffed giraffe. They're just not programmed to understand, are they Mr. Snufflebottoms?

Looking mysterious always makes you look like you gotta piss. Just grin and they’ll be forced to wonder what you’re laughing at.

Don’t expect an Englishman to get it. Remember--he’s not Irish.

If you see a buncha people standing around at an elevator, looking like they’re waiting for something, then for God’s sake, don’t go up and push the button. It’s irritating and obnoxious and... just don’t do it.

Don’t go into Victoria’s Secrets and ask if they have anything in men’s sizes. They look at you weird.
On second thought, *do* go in and ask for men’s sizes. Those poor ladies need something to brighten up their dull and otherwise meaningless existences.

If a dog licks you, don’t worry. He’s just being friendly. If you lick a dog, go straight to a doctor then a psychiatrist, you sicko...

Don’t take a Logic class and automatically assume to become logical. Instead, take a Logic class and expect to cry a lot.

Wear funky tee-shirts. You may feel like an idiot, but it makes other people smile like even *worse* idiots.

Remember that people never like a smart ass. Make smart-assed comments anyways.


Wednesday, August 27, 2003

National Day
For me, April 9 was a blur of faces distorted with fear, horror and tears. All over Baghdad you could hear shelling, explosions, clashes, fighter planes, the dreaded Apaches and the horrifying tanks heaving down streets and highways. Whether you loved Saddam or hated him, Baghdad tore you to pieces. Baghdad was burning. Baghdad was exploding… Baghdad was falling. April 9 is the American Occupation Day. I can understand why Bush was celebrating- I can’t understand how anyone who values independence would celebrate it.

April 9, I woke to the sound of a huge explosion at around 6 am, only 2 hours after I had fallen into a fitful sleep. I was sitting up stiff in bed, even before I had my eyes open. The room was warm, but I sat in bed, still in my jeans of the night before, my teeth chattering, clutching at the covers, groping my consciousness for sanity.

We had been sleeping in our clothes for the last few nights with pockets stuffed with identification papers and money because we kept expecting the house to come crumbling down around us... we wanted to be out the door as soon as it was necessary.

I listened to the noise that had become as common as crickets in the summer- the constant drone of helicopters, and fighter planes... explosions and shelling.

We spent the early hours of that morning watching eachother silently and solemnly- the only human voice in our midst was coming from the radio, crackling and fading. It told us what we already knew- what we had been dreading for what felt like an eternity- the American tanks were in Baghdad. There had been some resistance, but the tanks were all over Baghdad.

And that was the start of 'National Day'...

April 9 was a day of harried neighbors banging on the door, faces so contorted with anxiety they were almost beyond recognition. "Do we leave? Do we evacuate?! They sound so close..."

It was a day of shocked, horrified relatives, with dilated pupils and trembling lips, dragging duffel bags, spouses and terrified children needing shelter. All of us needing comfort that no one could give.

It was the day we sat at home, bags packed, fully dressed, listening for the tanks or the missile that would send us flying out of the house and into the streets. We sat calculating the risks of traveling from one end of Baghdad to the other or staying in our area and waiting for the inevitable.

It was the day I had to have 'the talk' with my mother. The day she sat me down in front of her and began giving me 'instructions'- just in case.
"In case of what, mom?”
"In case something happens to us..."
"Like what, like maybe we get separated?"
"Fine, ok. Yes. Separated, for example... you know where the money is, you know where the papers are..."
Yes, I know. But it won't matter if anything happens to you, or dad, or E.

It was a day of stray dogs howling in the streets with fear, flocks of birds flying chaotically in the sky- trying to escape the horrible noises and smoke.

It was a day of charred bodies in blackened vehicles.

It was a grayish-yellow day that burns red in my memory... a day that easily rises to the surface when I contemplate the most horrible days of my life.

That was the 'National Day' for me. From most accounts, it was the same for millions of others.

Maybe come April 9, 2004, Bremer and the Governing Council can join Bush in the White House to celebrate the fall of Baghdad... because we certainly won't be celebrating it here.
From the blog of an Iraqi woman using the alias of Riverbend. Read it here.


Tuesday, August 26, 2003

"If I told everybody how they could live inside of a post office box then everybody would stop paying landlords and go liveinside their post office boxes. It would collapse the building! Can you imagine, post offices collapsing all over the country, the hemispere, the PLANET! The whole world's communication system would be destroyed. No, no, I must not say. I dare not!
-Malaclypse the Younger

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Gypsie (To Hill): Since you wrote it, I take it that you are an anarchist?

G.H. Hill: Since then I have given up anarchy. Too many rules--hating the goverment and all that stuff.

Ignotius: It's like hating your own fantasies.

Malik: Anarchy is also standing up and proceeding foreward, fantasy rule or not. The condition is the same.

Occupant: Brother needs some wine!

Malik: We have had this argument before, Reverend Doctor Brother. But wine before platitudes, fill it up.

Gypsie (To Hill): And pacifism?

Hill: I'm not sure I ever was one. Mal-2 was not, Malik was. Personaly I accepted self defense yet I could never reconcile that with the ideal. I finally gave up on that one too. Actually, I just gave up on idealism.

Ignotius: Idealism lives with rules. Realism lives with rocks.

Hill: Yeah. I get along better with rocks.

Malik: Mal-2 once told be that pacifism was a dilemma. If everbody was a pacifist then everything would be perfect. But nobody is going to be a pacifist unless I am first. But if I am and somebody else is not, then I get screwed. He said that there were five choices under that circumstance. The first was napalming farmers and the second was executing you parents. The third was hypocrisy, the fourth was cowardice, and the fifth was to swallow the dilemma. Zenarchists are trained in dilemma swallowing.

An excerpt from the Norton Cabal Interview in Principia Discordia (K)ed to No One. All rites reversed, print what you like.


A Sermon on Ethics and Love

One day Mal-2 asked the messanger spirit Saint Gulik to approach the Goddess and request Her prescence for some desperate advice. Shortly afterwards, the radio came on by itself, and an ethereal female Voice said YES?

"O! Eris! Blessed Mother of Man! Queen of Chaos! Daughter of Discord! Concubine of Confusion! O! Exquisite Lady, I beseech You to lift a heavy burden from my heart!"


"I am filled with fear and tormented with terrible visions of pain. Everywhere people are hurting one another, the planet is rampant with injustices, whole societies plunder other groups of their own people, mothers imprison sons, children perish while brothers war. O, woe."


"But nobody wants it! Everybody hates it."


At which moment she turned herself in to an aspirin comercial and left the Polyfather stranded alone with his species.

An excerpt from Principia Discordia, which is written by everybody. Hail Eris! Fnord.

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People are supposed to look up to you and that's not because you're somersaulting over their heads!

There's earth under his old feet, and clay on his fingers; wisdom in his bones and both his eyes are open.
-Tom Bombadill

It seems to have been a very efficient conspiracy.

I don't deny it, but I'll never believe you're sleeping again, whether you're snoring or not. I shall kick you hard to make sure.


Monday, August 25, 2003

You're Never Safe Where the Pine is. Evil is Real. Satan is real.

I hear cries in the night, I see ghostly figures cross my room, I always feel like im being watched, I feel the presence of a Spirit, Demons are real, Iv seen one. And You'll Never know how it is like to live cold and hungry for blood. See and glance a Fleck a of a Glowing Red Eye, that is me. The eye in the corner of you eye. I see everything you see. I see death, you will see to. Beware. Wrath.

Everybody Had a preveous life. But might not Remember. I Do. I was a nine year old girl. Taken by the wolves. Died in the Ice. Brought back. As a Morph. I see you. I see Spirits. I feel you Hunger rise. Feed the Poor in Hungry lands. Be happy for what you have.Be gracous.

E-mailed to me by someone called Nazgul_wolf


Stay in vegitables, eat your school, dont do milk and drink your drugs.

"For a certainty, back then, we loved so many yet hated so much, we hurt others and were hurt ourselves..."

I miss my beautiful friend
I had to send him away
To bring us back again.

And I, I think I'll change my ways so all your words get noticed. Tomorrows a brand new day.

"Everyone thinks I'm this gigantic loser. And they're right...I have lost Something."

"Life has dealt me some bum cards, or maybe I just havent played them right, I dont know."


Sunday, August 24, 2003

Man who run in front of car get tired, Man who run behind car get exausted. Man who stand on toilet high on pot.


Friday, August 15, 2003

If your parents never had children, chances are you won’t either.


Wednesday, August 13, 2003

Going to the place where all the the pretty flowers grow. Be Back in a Hour or So

Sometimes when it's real quiet, I can hear my brain cells die...


Monday, August 11, 2003

The problem with you is that you can't tell the difference between "intense" and "in tents."


Thursday, August 07, 2003

Love is not enough to keep what you want, but it's enough to destroy what you have.

... with love and coffee Malinka Maikova...

"Living on Earth may be expensive, but it includes an annual free trip around the Sun."

I promise I'll be better for you.

"It is an honor having you in our town, beating random people, like that helpless man you just hit! Welcome!!"


Wednesday, August 06, 2003

O'er faded heath-flowers spun, or thorny furze,
The filmy Gossamer is lightly spread;
Waving in every sighing air that stirs,
As Fairy fingers had entwined the thread:
A thousand trembling orbs of lucid dew
Spangle the texture of the fairy loom,
As if soft Sylphs, lamenting as they flew,
Had wept departed Summer's transient bloom:
But the wind rises, and the turf receives
O'er faded heath-flowers spun, or thorny furze,
The filmy Gossamer is lightly spread;
Waving in every sighing air that stirs,
As Fairy fingers had entwined the thread:
A thousand trembling orbs of lucid dew
Spangle the texture of the fairy loom,

The glittering web: -- So, evanescent, fade
Bright views that Youth with sanguine heart believes:
So vanish schemes of bliss, by Fancy made;
circa the deviantART account ladymorgana Accompanying picture


You cannot escape destiny, but you can delay it indefinately and have a beer.

"The pleasure of the senses is always regulated in accordance with the imagination. Man can aspire to felicity only by serving all the whims of his imagination.”

We climbed up…until I finally saw through a round opening the beauteous things which Heaven holds. And there we came out to see, once more, the stars.
--Dante Alighieri

I'll be famous after I'm dead.

And through all these strange dreams I saw
The most tender trip on earth

"The imagination and personality of the individual cannot be trapped by small minds or defined by any one person." -Marilyn Manson

presse: ne pas avaler

Shock me sane.

Don't love me like you say you do
Hurt me like you say you won't.

I would love to control people the way I control my puppets, but the thought of shoving my hand up their asses don't appeal to me.

Naive little pieces.
What they tried to teach her
Quiet and protected.
Slightly anorexic.

All my armour is falling down.

my heart knows no other
the thought of love a fairytale
'and they lived happily ever after,
him hating her and her thinking he cared'

"my reflection offers no apology
but who said that I wasn't right?
and I've lived for years without a life
don't have a soul on my side
still ridiculed despite how hard that I have tried" CKY-Close Yet Far

Everything old is new again.

But of all sadness this was sad --
A woman's arms tried to shield
The head of a sleeping man
From the jaws of the final beast.

"God gave men brains bigger than those of dogs so they wouldn't hump women's legs at cocktail parties" -Hackers-

Happiness and hardship go hand in hand.

I have directions to the end of the world.

Something sinister lurks in the depths of planet Tallon IV. Interstellar bounty hunter Samus Aran is the only one who can destroy this evil... But first it must be found.

The light that burns twice as bright burns half as long - and you have burned so very, very brightly, Roy.

We shall soon be far away from you, but then you would never know it. You don't need anybody, inhuman that you are. How strange it is that we cannot do without you.

If the world kicks your ass, kick it back!

That there are artists who have the courage to show us things that we are not willing to look at on our own, is what is needed. Ruth Bernhard

Isn't it nice to follow her to the end?

How happy and content you are in life is directly linked to how much tea you consume nightly.

Fun Fact: The clothes you wear determine your worth as a human being!!

What is around you, but you cannot see. It makes you fear yourself. The fear isn't able to leave.

These city lights, They shine as silver and gold, dug from the night, your eyes as black as coal.

I feel as though I am living with people who are not yet born, with monsters who escape from the womb before their time.

And we can rust the whole world... and scatter it into the dust of the universe.


Tuesday, August 05, 2003

I am wrapping your horrifying present tonite. You will be amazed and scared of it. Perhaps you will eat it. I do not know. My cat tells me there is this "door" in my room and at any minute it might open and let him out. I told him that Totchi told YOU to tell ME that there was a "lamp" in YOUR room. Perhaps the two are pyschically linked...your lamp and my door, not our cats. Although that could also be true. My cat has been doing an unreasonable amount of smoooooooooging onto the floor when I put a towel on his head. the end.
A comment on this from the deviant sadwonderland


Instead of a trap door, what about a trap window? The guy looks out it, and if he leans too far, he falls out. Wait. I guess that's like a regular window.

They were generic, like wind-up toys.

The sun was shining on the sea
Shining with all his might
He did his very best to make the billows smooth and bright
And this was odd because it was the middle of the night.

My donuts are your donuts!

"The light of the moon, the stars of the night, let darkness guide me to the light."

"Time, places, people... They're all speeding up. So to cope with this evolutionary paranoia, strange people are chosen, who through their art can move progress more quickly."
~Velvet Goldmine.

This guy is my inner style waiting to come out and scream at the world that I have some.

Aww, you know we're the ones who should be thanking you. You kick ass, kid. Congrats on the hits and thanks for keeping us up to our elbows in eye candy.

When I think out loud my stupid little voice gets lost...
In fact I'm waiting for everyone to shut up

"Courage is like love, it must have hope for nourishment" Napoleon Bonaparte

i thought I was not good enough to live in you nose holes but I see I has made the wallpaper.

ok, mebbe ONE baked good. One or two baked adequates, if not goods.


Saturday, August 02, 2003

Derek: I thought you were all about giving to a cause and exposing the ceedy underbelly of American life.
Ryann: you were wrong. I'm all about amusing my self until school starts again.
From Ryann's ujournal

If you lost everything you thought you wanted, but you ended up with something you never thought you'd have, what would you go back and change? It's a story. It's just a story...