Thursday, February 24, 2011

Addiction is tricky. For example: a man who quit smoking for 11 years spent 15 seconds in an elevator with a man smoking a cigarette. He gave in.
What I'm trying to say is I think I love you again.

There are some feelings that fill you up
that dig their roots into your skin
and never let go
they swell
and blow you over
like wind and waves

For winter’s rains and ruins are over,
And all the season of snows and sin;
The days dividing lover and lover,
The light that loses, the night that wins;
And time remembered is grief forgotten,
And frosts are slain and flowers begotten,
And in green underwood and cover
Blossom by blossom the spring begins
-Algernon Charles Swinburne

Live out of your imagination, not your history. -Stephen R. Covey

Tomorrow is the most important thing in life. Comes into us at midnight very clean. It’s perfect when it arrives and it puts itself in our hands. It hopes we’ve learned something from yesterday.
-John Wayne

"Life isn't divided into genres. It's a horrifying, romantic, tragic, comical, science-fiction cowboy detective novel. You know, with a bit of pornography if you're lucky."

Some days you wake up and immediately start to worry. Nothing in particular is wrong it's just he suspicion that forces are aligning quietly and there will be trouble.

"We artists are indestructible, even in a prison cell or a concentration camp I would be almighty in my world of art. even if I had to paint my pictures with my wet tongue on the dusty floor of my cell." -Pablo Picasso

Some things are hard to write about. After something happens to you, you go to write it down, and either you over dramatize it or underplay it, exaggerate the wrong parts or ignore the important ones. At any rate you never write it quite the way you want to.
-Sylvia Plath


"Why do people have to be this lonely? What's the point of it all? Millions of people in this world, all of them yearning, looking to others to satisfy them, yet isolating themselves. Why? Was the earth put here just to nourish human loneliness?" - Haruki Murakami

And it’s not “clever lonely” (like Morrissey) or “interesting Lonely” (like Radiohead); it’s “lonely, lonely,” like the way it feels when you’re being hugged by someone and it somehow makes you sadder. -Chuck Klosterman

I LIKE
your mischievous smile
your rather weird hair
your sense of humor
your perverse mind
the occasional annoying conversations
the funny random noises you make
the burning touch of your fingertips on my skin
how you know most of the things on my mind
the way you take my breath away and never give it back

“And girls need cold anger. They need the cold simmer, the ceaseless grudge, the talent to avoid forgiveness, the side stepping of compromise. They need to know when they say something that they will never back down, ever, ever.”
Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West by Gregory MaGuire

Remember...
1. Whoever comes are the right people.
2. Whatever happens is the only thing that could have.
3. Whenever it starts is the right time.
4. When it's over, it's over.

There is no such thing as the good old days. There is only selective memory.

"In the end, what we regret the most are the chances we never too." -Frasier Crane

"I feel too much. That's what's going on." "Do you think one can feel too much? Or just feel the wrong ways?" "My insides don't match up with my outsides." "Do anyone's insides and outsides match up?" "I don't know. I'm only me." "Maybe that's what a person's personality is: the difference between the inside and the outside." "But it's worse for me." "I wonder if everyone thinks it's worse for him." "Probably."

Thursday, February 17, 2011

What I Love
  • Feelings
  • Nostalgia
  • Touch
  • Flowers
  • Telepathy
  • Snow outside, warm inside
  • Arms & Hands
  • Keeping in touch
  • Coincidences
  • Mornings
  • Meaningfulness
  • Tableclothes

Labels:

Love is the scars on your knees, the leftover food in the refrigerator, the song the birds sing, the pain you inflict, the sweet nothingness which flutters from your lover's mouth, a half-complete cigarette, diet coke with fizzles on your tongue, the rainbow sprinkles on your cupcake, the battered package you received in the mail the other day, the sound of wind escaping through a small gap in your window, the dampness in your hair, the chipped red varnish on your fingernails, you grandmother's musical box, the ballet shoes you've had since you were five, the music playing on your car stereo, the flaky paint on your walls, the bubblegum stuck under desks, the tooth-fairy, your hands and the things you can make with them, the kisses you blow, the clothes you wear, 5am morning breath, your sensitive teeth, the tingly feeling you get when you get touched at certain parts of your body, the tangles in your lover's hair, sleepless nights, overdosing on painkillers, undeserved success and recognition, telling lies and not getting caught, blacking out from consuming too much alcohol, being desired by multiple parties, solving a mathematical problem, watching the people around you, watching the people fucking up around you, screaming out of your window in the middle of the night, flaming your lover's ex, make-up sex, smudged mascara, disheveled hair and smeared lipstick, the coffee and bagel you digest on a daily basis, little children, silence, recyclable materials, trees, photosynthesis, growth, development

No. Love is
you, I and a careless mixture of everything else we worry about.

Labels:

I can never read all the books I want; I can never be all the people I want and live all the lives I want. I can never train myself in all the skills I want. And why do I want? I want to live and feel all the shades, tones and variations of mental and physical experience possible in life. And I am horribly limited. - Silvia Plath

If you believe in love
but fine it difficult to
explain:
This is for you.

"In an effort to get people to look into each other's eyes more, the government has decided to allot each person exactly one hundred and sixty-seven words per day. When the phone rings, I put it to my ear without saying hello. In the restaurant, I point at chicken noodle soup. I am adjusting well to the new way. Late at night, I call my long-dstance lover and proudly say: I only used fifty-nine words today, I saved the rest for you. When she doesn't respond, I know she's used up all her words, so I slowly whisper 'I love you' thirty-two and a third times. After that, we just sit on the line and listen to each other breathe."
-Jeffrey McDaniel

no amount of coffee
no amount of crying
no amount of whiskey
no amount of wine
no, nothing else will do
I gotta have you.

Go now, and live.
Experience. Dream. Risk. Close your eyes and jump. Enjoy the freefall. Choose exhilaration over comfort. Choose magic over predictability. Choose potential over safety. Wake up to the magic of everyday life. Make friends with your intuition. Trust your gut. Discover the beauty of uncertainty. Know yourself fully before you make promises to another. Make millions of mistakes so that you will know how to choose what you really need. Know when to hold on and when to let go. Love hard and often and without reservation. Seek knowledge. Open yourself up to possibility. Keep your heart open, your head high and your spirit free. Embrace your darkness along with your light. Be wrong every once in a while, and don't be afraid to admit it. Awaken to the brilliance in ordinary moments. Tell the truth about yourself no matter what the cost. Own your reality without apology. See goodness in the world. Be Bold. Be Fierce. Be Grateful. Be Wild, Crazy and Gloriously Free. Be you.
Go now, and live.
-Jeanette LeBlanc

I hate when I start liking someone because then I start expecting things out of them.

Sufjan Stevens was found in a milk crate on the doorstep of Mr. and Mrs. Stevens, in Detroit, MI, on Canada Day, July 1, 1975. He was wrapped in cellophane, and tagged on the wrist with the mysterious note: “I love you.” Mr. and Mrs. Stevens had three other children: Jo-Jo, Zukey-Dukey, and Jam-Jam. Mrs. Stevens crocheted afghans for the flea market. Mr. Stevens was the custodian at the hospital. They had very little money, but very big hearts. They decided to keep the baby (using the milk crate to hold their National Geographics). They named him Sufjan Stevens, after Abu Sufjan Muhammad, the great Armenian Sufi warrior who slew ten thousand dragons to save the Fairy Princess. Despite his despondent looks, Sufjan was a good kid. Mr. and Mrs. Stevens did the best they could. They fed him carrots, they read him parts of the Bhagavad Gita, they combed his hair, they sang songs and tap-danced in the living room. Things were looking good!

We've got our deepest hopes tattooed on our eyelids, so when we sleep we speak fireworks.

What about little microphones? What if everyone swallowed them, and they played the sounds of our hearts through little speakers, which could be in the pouches of our overalls? When you skateboarded down the street at night you could hear everyone's heartbeat, and they could hear yours, sort of like sonar. One weird thing is, I wonder if everyone's hearts would start to beat at the same time, like how women who live together have their menstrual periods at the same time, which I know about, but I don't really want to know about. That would be so weird, except that the place in the hospital where babies are born would sound like a crystal chandelier in a houseboat, because the babies wouldn't have had time to match up their heartbeats yet. And at the finish line at the end of the New York City Marathon it would sound like war.
-Justin Safran Foer

There are things you do
because they feel right
& they may make no sense
& they may make no money
& it may be the real reason
we are here: to love each
other & to eat each other's
cooking & say it was good.
-B. Andreas

Go after her. Fuck, don't sit there and wait for her to call, go after her because that's what you should do if you love someone, don't wait for them to give you a sign cause it might never come, don't let people happen to you, don't let me happen to you, or her, she's not a fucking television show or tornado. There are people I might have loved had they gotten on the airplane or run down the street after me or called me up drunk at four in the morning because they need to tell me right now and because they cannot regret this and I always thought I'd be the only one doing crazy things for people who would never give enough of a fuck to do it back or to act like idiots or be entirely vulnerable and honest and making someone fall in love with you is easy and flying 3000 miles on four days notice because you can't just sit there and do nothing and breathe into telephones is not everyone's idea of love but it is the way I can recognize it because that is what I do. Go scream it and be with her in meaningful ways because that is beautiful and that is generous and that is what loving someone is, that is raw and that is unguarded, and that is all that is worth anything, really.

"You must write every single day of your life. You must lurk in libraries to sniff books like perfumes & wear books like hats upon your crazy heads. May you be in love every day for the next 20,000 days. & out of that love, remake a world." - Ray Bradbury

Real courage is when you know you’re licked before you begin but you begin anyway and see it through no matter what. - Atticus Finch

i want to wear your sweatshirt to bed, watch scary movies with you, talk on the phone until sunrise, sneak out at night to look at the stars with you, play your favorite video game, make you watch chick flicks, kiss you in the rain, go on walks with you, laugh until i can't breath, hold hands, build a fort and have a snowball fight, sit in front of the fireplace and talk about life. i want to fall hopelessly in love with you.

"There isn't anyone you couldn't love once you've heard their story." -Mary Lou Kownacki
(Mister Roger's favorite quote)

Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.
-Plato

i've fallen for you like an amazonian tree.
which is to say:
hard, fast, and although unnoticed by most
of the world's population,
not without great consequence.

"Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark. In the hopeless swamps of the not quite, the not yet, and the not at all, do not let the hero in your soul perish and leave only frustration for the life you deserved, but never have been able to reach. The world you desire can be won, it exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours."
-Ayn Rand

"Everything that is beautiful will eventually break our hearts OR our hands will eventually break everything that is beautiful."

The worst mistake you can make is to think you're alive when really, you're asleep in life's waiting room.

"These are not books, lumps of lifeless paper, but minds alive on the shelves." -Gilbert Highet

I am not sad, he would repeat to himself over and over, I am not sad. As if he might one day convince himself. Or fool himself. Or convince others -- the only thing worse than being sad is for others to know that you are sad. I am not sad. I am not sad. Because his life had unlimited potential for happiness, insofar as it was an empty white room. He would fall asleep with his heart at the foot of his bed, like some domesticated animal that was no part of him at all. And each morning he would wake with it again in the cupboard of his rib cage, having become a little heavier, a little weaker, but still pumping. And by midafternoon he was again overcome with the desire to be somewhere else, someone else, someone else somewhere else. I am not sad. -Justin Safran Foer

Life is a battle;
Wear your scars with pride.

it's not who you are that holds you back, it's who you think you are not. - anonymous


I am not
I am not what you want
But I turn off the light
and take you out on plush dates
that involve popcorn and
rusty bicycles in Tokyo.
I suck on a pear flavored candy.
I want to be unique.
I want to be the one you love more than anything.